The secret to living life with a Disability.
If you’re looking for a list
of 10 things that will make your disability easier. Or the answer to life. I’m
really sorry I don’t have the answers. Maybe it is 42!
The only secret that I’ve gathered is there probably isn’t one. I’ve read a plethora of books on philosophy, psychology, religion and disabilities. Not one can give me a definitive answer. I have however gained and received much from my endeavours and search in developing personally.
So whilst I continue my research I want to posit a theory. Which is perhaps there is no secret. It’s not the disability that will make you happy or sad. It’s your outlook on life. There are some who will see things as a challenge and enjoy that challenge. There are others who will struggle with the daily existence of living with a disability. But that is the same for all disabled and undisabled. We all struggle and strive regardless of what we have it is in my view truly down to you.
What is this happiness we search for? Can we really be happy all the time? I think not. Not only can we not be happy all the time, but we need the sadness and the struggle as a way of knowing when we are happy. Without the struggle and difficulties we would not know when we have overcome these things that makes us happy. So perhaps the balance we should be looking for is contentment. Which is everything’s ok. I have everything I need to live a life, therefore I’m ok. Now I know that a lot of disabled people will say, yes but I have additional needs that need to be met. Yes I agree. Disability does mean that you need help or resources. But that’s not what I’m talking about. This is more fundamental. If you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back and know where your next meal is coming from. Your very basic needs have been met.
What I do struggle with is the fact that I am labelled as someone who should be singled out because of my disability. I have a disability, therefore it must make me miserable or an inspiration. Even the word sometimes “disabled “makes me cringe. In essence it says I’m not complete. I’m (Dis) less able. Therefore I’m not allowed to compete with my peers in the world all because of a lack of consideration for disabilities. Aka, not following the social model of disability. It’s been around for some time now, yet few people understand it or follow the principles. Including Disabled people. It’s not all about access but it does require a change in thought process. Out of everything I’ve learnt it’s often this change that is what is required for most obstacles to be overcome. It is not you that’s the problem or issue, it’s our environment and the external processes that people are programmed to think and accept.
I read a lot of blogs from other disabled people. The ones that always stand out are the ones that try to be positive. It annoys me a bit as I think a lot of these disabled bloggers should be recognised not as a disabled blogger. But as a can do person. To compete equally as a positive person. Not due to their disabilities but on top of and regardless. To me it’s not their disabilities it’s their attitude regardless of what’s thrown at them that makes them interesting. These people if they went writing about issues with disabilities. I believe they would still be pushing boundaries and fighting for some other just cause. That’s who they are.
So the answer perhaps lies in the ability to somehow adapt. Adapt to the situation. So how do you adapt when you can’t walk away it has to be more of adaption at a cerebral level. After all we are what we think. Therefore if we think we can we will!
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not easy or going to be easy. But then ask anyone working towards happiness or success isn’t easy you have to work at it. You have to keep searching. After all it’s the journey and the difficult route that makes you stronger. If you really want to see how great things can be you have to go up hill. That’s where the most beautiful views are. Where things become clearer and you can see further.
The only secret that I’ve gathered is there probably isn’t one. I’ve read a plethora of books on philosophy, psychology, religion and disabilities. Not one can give me a definitive answer. I have however gained and received much from my endeavours and search in developing personally.
So whilst I continue my research I want to posit a theory. Which is perhaps there is no secret. It’s not the disability that will make you happy or sad. It’s your outlook on life. There are some who will see things as a challenge and enjoy that challenge. There are others who will struggle with the daily existence of living with a disability. But that is the same for all disabled and undisabled. We all struggle and strive regardless of what we have it is in my view truly down to you.
What is this happiness we search for? Can we really be happy all the time? I think not. Not only can we not be happy all the time, but we need the sadness and the struggle as a way of knowing when we are happy. Without the struggle and difficulties we would not know when we have overcome these things that makes us happy. So perhaps the balance we should be looking for is contentment. Which is everything’s ok. I have everything I need to live a life, therefore I’m ok. Now I know that a lot of disabled people will say, yes but I have additional needs that need to be met. Yes I agree. Disability does mean that you need help or resources. But that’s not what I’m talking about. This is more fundamental. If you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back and know where your next meal is coming from. Your very basic needs have been met.
What I do struggle with is the fact that I am labelled as someone who should be singled out because of my disability. I have a disability, therefore it must make me miserable or an inspiration. Even the word sometimes “disabled “makes me cringe. In essence it says I’m not complete. I’m (Dis) less able. Therefore I’m not allowed to compete with my peers in the world all because of a lack of consideration for disabilities. Aka, not following the social model of disability. It’s been around for some time now, yet few people understand it or follow the principles. Including Disabled people. It’s not all about access but it does require a change in thought process. Out of everything I’ve learnt it’s often this change that is what is required for most obstacles to be overcome. It is not you that’s the problem or issue, it’s our environment and the external processes that people are programmed to think and accept.
I read a lot of blogs from other disabled people. The ones that always stand out are the ones that try to be positive. It annoys me a bit as I think a lot of these disabled bloggers should be recognised not as a disabled blogger. But as a can do person. To compete equally as a positive person. Not due to their disabilities but on top of and regardless. To me it’s not their disabilities it’s their attitude regardless of what’s thrown at them that makes them interesting. These people if they went writing about issues with disabilities. I believe they would still be pushing boundaries and fighting for some other just cause. That’s who they are.
So the answer perhaps lies in the ability to somehow adapt. Adapt to the situation. So how do you adapt when you can’t walk away it has to be more of adaption at a cerebral level. After all we are what we think. Therefore if we think we can we will!
Don’t get me wrong. It’s not easy or going to be easy. But then ask anyone working towards happiness or success isn’t easy you have to work at it. You have to keep searching. After all it’s the journey and the difficult route that makes you stronger. If you really want to see how great things can be you have to go up hill. That’s where the most beautiful views are. Where things become clearer and you can see further.
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